Returning home from a recent road trip, I set my radio to the K-LOVE station and heard a rather thought-provoking statement. The radio host phrased it something like this, “You cannot change those around you, but you can change those around you.” Now, just let that sink in for a moment. Not only is this statement profound but also incredibly accurate. In fact, the more I pondered both perspectives, the more I wanted to dive into what God’s Word has to say on the topic. Therefore, join me as we explore embracing how (and when) to become a powerful change agent within your own circle of influence.
What Are Change Agents?
According to Mary K. Pratt and Joseph Flahiff of Whitewater Projects Incorporated (2018), a change agent is defined as, “someone who promotes and enables change to happen within any group or organization.” Although the term is often used in the business world, change agents exist and operate in many facets of life. Therefore, let us examine how you can become a change agent within your own circle of influence.
The Connection Between the Serenity Prayer and Your Circle of Influence
One prayer, whose use has permeated society in a variety of contexts, is the Serenity Prayer. As a young child, I received a faith card with the Serenity Prayer printed on it and carried it with me for many years. With the passage of time, I learned this blessed prayer is incorporated in Twelve Step Recovery programs. Why? Simply put, the heart of the Serenity Prayer’s message is finding a sense of balance between acceptance and change. The value of achieving this level of balance is beneficial for every person, not just those working to overcome addiction.
The balance between acceptance and change directly corresponds to an individual’s circle of influence. In his self-help book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey discusses how people should spend their time and energy on things in life on which they can exert some influence (i.e., courage to change the things one can). He refers to this as an individual’s circle of influence. Furthermore, Covey cautions against getting caught up focusing on aspects outside of one’s control (i.e., accepting things one cannot change). The key is knowing the difference.
Once You Know the Difference, What’s Next?
First and foremost, take everything to God in prayer. Apostle Paul reminds us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” (Philippians 4:6, NIV) (bold and italics added for emphasis). In addition, King Solomon used his wisdom to remind believers, “A person’s steps are directed by the LORD. How then can anyone understand their own way?” (Proverbs 20:24, NIV). Therefore, if you find yourself needing discernment in a situation, bring it to God for His guidance. After all, God will direct His children’s paths when they seek Him, including you dear friend.
When You Cannot Change Those Around You
Perhaps you witnessed, or have knowledge of, others engaged in undesirable, sinful, or nefarious behaviors. These types of actions can only result in harmful, or perhaps devastating, consequences. As difficult as it is to accept, however, no individual can directly change another person’s thoughts or actions.
Looking to the Father’s perfect example, we see He provides each of us with free will. As painful and heartbreaking as it must be watching His children fall short of the plans He has for them, He does it anyway. Why? He wants us to desire a relationship with Him but not through force or coercion. Therefore, if we follow God’s lead, all any of us can realistically hope to accomplish is influencing others.
How can we influence others? As my parents always taught me, “Actions speak louder than words.” Therefore, serve as a powerful witness to others of God’s unconditional love and grace through your actions as well as testimony. You see, times will arise when you feel the Holy Spirit nudging you into action (see post titled “Immeasurable Power Borne out of the Holy Spirit’s Nudging”). Instead of hesitating in those moments, boldly step out in faith and let Him do the rest!
How You Can Change Those Around You
Sometimes when an individual attempts to influence another, the situation develops into something more toxic in nature. When this happens despite a person’s sincere attempt to affect change, they must make the conscious choice to literally change those around them. Put another way, the time may come when the people surrounding you threaten to pull you away from your walk with God. When this happens, you have a life-changing choice to make. Do you risk your spiritual health by staying with them, or do you choose to part ways in order to draw closer to God? If you choose the latter, then you are (literally) changing those around you!
What does God’s Word say about actually changing those around you? Apostle Paul cautions Christians by saying, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world [but] be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:2, NIV). What a timeless and extremely relevant message! Even during ancient times, Paul acknowledges the potential risks created and fueled by peer pressure and free will!
Closing Thoughts and a Call to Action
You cannot change those around you, but you can change those around you. Powerful words and a profound message! How about you? Do you consider yourself as one who can ignite the change you want to see in the world? Well, I am here to tell you that you are exactly that person! How could I possibly know? Really, it is quite simple. God made YOU. He equipped YOU for a special purpose which only YOU can accomplish in all of your exquisite uniqueness. Therefore, carefully examine your life and then embrace how (and when) to become a powerful change agent within your own circle of influence. After all, God designed you perfectly for moments such as this!
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Who Better to Run Your “Faith Race” Than You!
Special Acknowledgment:
Feature image by Nataliya Vaitkevich on Pexels.com.